I want so much. Do so much.

So much to do, but how do I find an order? How do I find a way? Where am I going? Where do I take a step? Ideas are racing around in my head. I know what I want. I really know, but how? How do I do that? Should I combine it with something else? So it seems logical and feasible? So I can do it, in order that I can do it myself? Should I make it happen by getting a different job? Should I do that, I'd rather not.

Actually, I want everything, but I cannot lose myself in my short enthusiasm for everything around me. I can no longer lose myself in the idea of normal. In the idea of what is realistic.

I have a great life. Even though perhaps no one will understand that. That is no longer important because the people who accept or understand will stay with me. The rest is okay. Not everyone has to understand me... It's okay to do it my way. It's okay to figure it out my own way.

I still feel lost sometimes, but even so, I am free. Free for wonder.